- If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.
- Hard work pays off in the future. Laziness pays off now
- A conclusion is the place where you got tired of thinking.
- Bills travel through the mail at twice the speed of checks
- Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.
- For every action, there is an equal and opposite criticism.
- Never do card tricks for the group you play poker with.
- No one is listening until you make a mistake.
- The severity of the itch is proportional to the reach.
- You never really learn to swear until you learn to drive.
- A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.
- To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism; to steal from many is research.
- The colder the X-ray table, the more of your body is required on it.
- The hardness of the butter is proportional to the softness of the bread.
- Money can't buy love.But it CAN rent a very close imitation.
- If you must choose between two evils, pick the one you've never tried before.
- A conscience is what hurts when all your other parts feel so good.
Added : 8.4.2008