Signs that you are too drunk would be...

  • You lose arguments with inanimate objects.
  • You have to hold onto the lawn to keep from falling off the earth.
  • Job interfering with your drinking.
  • Your doctor finds traces of blood in your alcohol stream.
  • Career won't progress beyond Senator of Massachusetts.
  • The back of your head keeps getting hit by the toilet seat.
  • Sincerely believe alcohol to be the elusive 5th food group.
  • 24 hours in a day, 24 beers in a case - coincidence?? - I think not!
  • Two hands and just one mouth... - now THAT'S a drinking problem!
  • You can focus better with one eye closed.
  • The parking lot seems to have moved while you were in the bar.
  • Your twin sons are named Barley and Hops.
  • Hey, 5 beers has just as many calories as a burger, screw dinner!
  • Mosquitoes catch a buzz after attacking you
  • At AA meetings you begin: "Hi, my name is... uh..."
  • Your idea of cutting back is less salt.
  • You wake up in the bedroom, your underwear is in the bathroom, you fell asleep clothed. - hmmm.
  • The whole bar says 'Hi' when you come in...
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Added : 27.4.2011
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Tags: drunk, list, when
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