These where found on the net and all off them made me laugh.I hope you find them funny too. Express youself by rating and commenting the jokes you read so you can see what others thought of the joke.

Never be afraid to try something new.

1. Thoroughly clean the toilet.

Michael Jordan having "retired," with $40 million in endorsements, makes $178,100 a day, working or not.

A man doing market research knocked on a door and was greeted by a redhead with three small children running around at her feet.

One day a hippie gets a ride on a public bus and sees a hot young nun. He sits down next to her and promptly asks if she would like to have sex, to which she immediately says no and walks off the bus.

Jacob, age 92, and Rebecca, age 89, are living in Florida and are all excited about their decision to get married.

"Wordperfect Customer Support; may I help you?" "Yes, well, I'm having trouble with WordPerfect."

"If the enemy is in range, so are you." -Infantry Journal, "It is generally inadvisable to eject directly over the area you just bombed.." -U.S. Air Force Manual

A sweet old lady telephoned St. Joseph's Hospital. She timidly asked, "Is it possible to speak to someone who can tell me how a patient is doing?"