One day when the teacher walked to the black board, she noticed someone had written the word 'penis' in tiny letters.
A man is having a few drinks at a bar when he looks over and notices a drunk guy passed out at a table nearby. The bartender tells him the drunk is Mr. Murphy and asks the man if he could drive Mr. Murphy home.
A blonde had just gotten a new sports car and was out for a drive when she accidentally cut off a truck driver.
Three men were sitting together bragging about how they had given their new wives duties.
Use of the word "beautiful".
A radio station in Australia recently ran a phone-in competition to find the most embarrassing moments in the lives of their listeners.
Little Bobby came into the kitchen where his mother was making dinner. His birthday was coming up and he thought this was a good time to tell his mother what he wanted.
A Captain in the foreign legion was transferred to a desert outpost. On his orientation tour he noticed a very old, seedy looking camel tied out back of the enlisted mens barracks.
A man and his wife are in the shower together when the doorbell rings. The wife puts on a robe and goes down to answer the door.
On reaching his plane seat a man is surprised to see a parrot strapped in next to him.
Cover your stump before you hump....