action jokes

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Arithmetic
A boy was teaching a girl arithmetic, he said it was his mission. He kissed her once; he kissed her twice and said, "Now that's addition."
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Beer troubleshooting
SYMPTOM: Feet cold and wet.FAULT: Glass being held at incorrect angle.ACTION: Rotate glass so that open end points toward ceiling.
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My word

BEAUTY PARLOR: A place where women curl up and dye. CANNIBAL: Someone who is fed up with people.

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Happy Birthday
Once upon a time there lived a woman who had a maddening passion for baked beans. She loved them but ...
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Gorilla job

This guy needs a job and decides to apply at the zoo. As it happened, their star attraction, a gorilla, had passed away the night before and they had carefully preserved his hide.

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Partying Husband
A man left for work one Friday afternoon. But, being pay-day, instead of going home, he stayed out the entire ...
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The Barbecue

Definition of Outdoor Barbecuing: It's the only type of cooking a "real" man will do. When a man volunteers to do such cooking, the following chain of events is put into motion.

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The Rolls Royce
A blonde walks into a bank in New York City and asks for the loan officer. She says she's going to Europe on business for two weeks and needs to borrow $5,000.
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Rats
A tourist wanders into a back-alley antique shop in San Francisco's Chinatown. Picking through the objects on display he discovers a detailed bronze sculpture of a rat...
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The Barbecue
Definition of Outdoor Barbecuing: It's the only type of cooking a "real" man will do. When a man volunteers to do such cooking, the following chain of events is put into motion.
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