I'm writing you this letter to tell you that I'm leaving you forever. I've been a good man to you for 7 years & I have nothing to show for it. These last 2 weeks have been hell.
After the annual office Christmas party blow-out, John woke up with a pounding headache, cotton-mouthed, and utterly unable to recall the events of the preceding evening.
A lonely woman, aged 70, decided that it was time to get married.
Subject: Membership Renewal
One day there were four nuns in line for confessional. The first nun said, "Forgive me, father, for I have sinned."
There was this guy at a bar, just looking at his drink. He stays like that for half of an hour.
When you occasionally have a really bad day, and you just need to take it out on someone, don't take it out on someone you know -- take it out on someone you don't know.
A man is having a few drinks at a bar when he looks over and notices a drunk guy passed out at a table nearby. The bartender tells him the drunk is Mr. Murphy and asks the man if he could drive Mr. Murphy home.
Next time you think that you're having a bad day recall that...
1. But everybody looks funny naked! 2. You woke me up for that? 3. Did I mention the video camera?