Guy goes into the Chemist's to buy a pack of condoms. Asked what size pack, he replies, "a pack of 10, that's what I usually get".
A girl asks her boyfriend to come over Friday night and have dinner with her parents. Since this is such a big event, the girl tells him that after dinner, she would like to have sex with him for the first time.
I was a very happy man. My wonderful girlfriend and I had been dating for over a year, and so we decided to get married. There was only one little thing bothering me - it was her beautiful younger sister.
How To Maintain A Healthy Level Of Insanity: 1. At lunch time, sit in your parked car with sunglasses on and point a hair dryer at passing cars. See if they slow down.