fuck me jokes

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displaying 91-120 out of 239
Talking to god

Little Jimmy was laying about on a hillock in the middle of a meadow on a warm spring day. Puffy white clouds rolled by and he pondered their shape. Soon, he began to think about God.

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Clean hungover
Larry wakes up at home with a huge hangover. He forces himself to open his eyes, and the first thing ...
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Lucky Frog

A man takes the day off work and decides to go out golfing. He is on the second hole when he notices a frog sitting next to the green.

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Partying Husband
A man left for work one Friday afternoon. But, being pay-day, instead of going home, he stayed out the entire ...
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Vocabulary day
There was a class and each student had to go up to the front of the class and say a sentence using one of their spelling words. First Juan goes up and his word was love so he says...
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Deer Hunter
A sportsman, and father of 3 sons, was anxious to share his latest kill with his family for Sunday dinner. ...
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The mugger
Late one night a mugger wearing a ski mask jumped into a path of a well-dressed man and stuck a ...
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At Wal-Mart
A lady goes into Wal-Mart to buy a rod and reel for her hubbie. She doesn't know which one to get, so walks over to the register. A Wal-mart associate is standing there with sunglasses on. She says, "Excuse me sir ... can you tell me anythi
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Crazy Talk
Cal was out driving in the country, seeing how his new car handled the curvy roads at high speeds. As ...
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The wish

One day, down in the mystical forest, a magical frog was hopping towards a water hole. The forest was so enormous that the frog had never laid eyes on another animal before.

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No Problem There
This woman rushed to see her doctor, looking very much worried and all strung out. She rattles off: “Doctor, take a look at me.
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Did I saw well?
An old cowhand came riding into town on a hot, dry, dusty day. The local sheriff watched from his chair in front of the saloon as the cowboy wearily dismounted and tied his horse to the rail a few feet in front of the sheriff. "Howdy, Stranger.&
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Nice Grass
One afternoon, a wealthy lawyer was riding in the back of his limousine when he saw two men eating grass ...
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Smart monkey
A guy walks into a bar with his pet monkey. He orders a drink and, while he's nursing it, the monkey runs wild.
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Commit suicide
I remember back in 1995 i went over to my neighbors house. She was a blonde and for some reason she was mad at the world. She was in the bathroom and the door was locked...
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Pretend we are married
A man and a woman who have never met before find themselves in the same sleeping carriage of a train. After the initial embarrassment, they both manage to get to sleep; the woman on the top bunk, the man on the lower. In the middle of the night the w
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Overworked
For a couple years I 've been blaming it on lack of sleep and too much pressure from my job, but now I found out the real reason: I'm tired because I'm overworked. The population of this country is 237 million.
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Deep hole

Two guys are walking through the woods and come across this big deep hole. "Wow...that looks deep." "Sure does... toss a few pebbles in there and see how deep it is."

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displaying 91-120 from a total of 239