fuck me jokes

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displaying 91-120 out of 239
Clean hungover
Larry wakes up at home with a huge hangover. He forces himself to open his eyes, and the first thing ...
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Lucky Frog

A man takes the day off work and decides to go out golfing. He is on the second hole when he notices a frog sitting next to the green.

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Partying Husband
A man left for work one Friday afternoon. But, being pay-day, instead of going home, he stayed out the entire ...
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Vocabulary day
There was a class and each student had to go up to the front of the class and say a sentence using one of their spelling words. First Juan goes up and his word was love so he says...
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Deer Hunter
A sportsman, and father of 3 sons, was anxious to share his latest kill with his family for Sunday dinner. ...
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The mugger
Late one night a mugger wearing a ski mask jumped into a path of a well-dressed man and stuck a ...
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At Wal-Mart
A lady goes into Wal-Mart to buy a rod and reel for her hubbie. She doesn't know which one to get, so walks over to the register. A Wal-mart associate is standing there with sunglasses on. She says, "Excuse me sir ... can you tell me anythi
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Crazy Talk
Cal was out driving in the country, seeing how his new car handled the curvy roads at high speeds. As ...
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The wish

One day, down in the mystical forest, a magical frog was hopping towards a water hole. The forest was so enormous that the frog had never laid eyes on another animal before.

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No Problem There
This woman rushed to see her doctor, looking very much worried and all strung out. She rattles off: “Doctor, take a look at me.
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Did I saw well?
An old cowhand came riding into town on a hot, dry, dusty day. The local sheriff watched from his chair in front of the saloon as the cowboy wearily dismounted and tied his horse to the rail a few feet in front of the sheriff. "Howdy, Stranger.&
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Nice Grass
One afternoon, a wealthy lawyer was riding in the back of his limousine when he saw two men eating grass ...
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IRS and the gambler

During an IRS audit, the auditor looked at the tax payer and exclaimed "Well, sir, you have an extravagant lifestyle and no full-time employment, which you explain by saying that you win money gambling. I'm not sure the IRS fin

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Devil Lawsuit
There was a construction worker who was working on a building when he fell 15 stories to his bloody death. ...
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Jet fuel
Bud and Jim were a couple of drinking buddies who worked as airplane mechanics in ATLANTA. One day the airport was fogged in and they were stuck in the hangar with nothing to do. Bud said, "Man, I wish we had something to drink!"
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Children & Proverbs

A first grade teacher collected well known proverbs. She gave each child in her class the first half of a proverb and asked them to come up with the remainder of the proverb. Their insight may surprise you.

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Confessions of a kid

Little Bobby came into the kitchen where his mother was making dinner. His birthday was coming up and he thought this was a good time to tell his mother what he wanted.

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Toughest Golf Shot
A golfer stood over his tee shot for what seemed like an eternity. Looking up, looking down, measuring the distance, ...
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displaying 91-120 from a total of 239