fuck me jokes

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displaying 211-239 out of 239
Lunch
The teacher of the earth science class was lecturing on map reading.After explaining about latitude, longitude, degrees and minutes the teacher asked,
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Love Dress

A mother-in-law stopped unexpectedly by her son's house after he was recently married. She rang the doorbell and stepped into the house to see her daughter-in-law standing naked by the door.

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Chasing elephants

A man is driving on a city bus with a newspaper on his knee. From time to time, he rips a piece off, ripping that piece into smaller ones and throwing them out the window.

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Collision
A head-on collision occurred between a man and a woman. Both emerged from the scene intact while their cars were totally demolished.
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It's tough being 80
Three men were discussing aging at the nursing home. "Sixty is the worst age to be," said the 60-year-old. You always feel like you have to pee. And most of the time, you stand at the toilet and nothing comes out!" "Ah, that'
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Ring a Bell
A man who was born with no arms wished to seek employment. Fearing nobody would want to hire him with ...
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Love Life Problems

A guy went to a psychiatrist because he was having severe problems with his sex life. The psychiatrist asked him a lot of questions, but didn't seem to be getting a clear picture of the problems.

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The simple answer

This concerns a question in a physics degree exam at the University of Copenhagen: "Describe how to determine the height of a skyscraper with a barometer."

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Blonde Mail
This guy is sitting outside on his lawn when he sees his blonde neighbor walk outside and check her mailbox. ...
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Blondevision
A blonde went to an appliance store sale and found a bargain. "I would like to buy this TV," she told the salesman.
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Duck hinting
A game warden came upon a duck hunter who had bagged 3 ducks and decided to 'enforce the laws pending.' He stopped the hunter, flashed his badge and said, Looks like you've had a pretty good day. Mind if I inspect your kill?'
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Cat quotes

To bathe a cat takes brute force, perseverance, courage of conviction, and a cat. The last ingredient is usually the hardest to come by....

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The nude woman

A young man moved into a new apartment on his own, and went to the lobby to put his name on his mailbox.

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The pharmacist
The patient staggered to the pharmacy counter flinching;Say, would you give me something for my head?...
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True Love

A husband and wife went to dinner and celebrated their fiftieth wedding anniversary. Afterwards they returned home and went to their patio to relax with a glass of wine and to reflect on their fifty years together.

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Ugly Baby
A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: “That's the ugliest baby that I've ever seen. Ugh!
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displaying 211-239 from a total of 239
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