A first grade teacher collected well known proverbs. She gave each child in her class the first half of a proverb and asked them to come up with the remainder of the proverb. Their insight may surprise you.
A very elderly couple is having an elegant dinner to celebrate their 75th wedding anniversary.
A sweet old lady telephoned St. Joseph's Hospital. She timidly asked, "Is it possible to speak to someone who can tell me how a patient is doing?"
Use of the word "beautiful".
The U.S. Government held an experiment to see what people say right before they get into an auto accident.
Students were assigned to read 2 books, "Titanic" & "My Life" by Bill Clinton.
A man is having a few drinks at a bar when he looks over and notices a drunk guy passed out at a table nearby. The bartender tells him the drunk is Mr. Murphy and asks the man if he could drive Mr. Murphy home.
A highway patrol officer has admitted writing "kitchen bitch" as the occupation of a Greymouth teenager on an infringement ticket he issued her.
1. I can see your point, but I still think you're full of shit.
BEAUTY PARLOR: A place where women curl up and dye. CANNIBAL: Someone who is fed up with people.