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Hospital Patient

A sweet old lady telephoned St. Joseph's Hospital. She timidly asked, "Is it possible to speak to someone who can tell me how a patient is doing?"

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Birthday Treat
Dave works hard at the plant and spends most evenings bowling or playing basketball at the gym. His wife thinks ...
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Brother and sister
Hearing a scream from the playroom, the mother rushed in and found her infant daughter pulling the hair of her four-year-old brother. After separating them, the mother said to her son,Do not be upset with your sister, honey. She didn' t know...
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911
A frantic woman had dialed 911. Police, fire, or ambulance? asked the operator.
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A ride home

A man is having a few drinks at a bar when he looks over and notices a drunk guy passed out at a table nearby. The bartender tells him the drunk is Mr. Murphy and asks the man if he could drive Mr. Murphy home.

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Christmas Signs
Toy Store: "Ho, ho, ho spoken here." -------Bridal boutique: "Marry Christmas."-------Outside a church: "The Original Christmas Club.
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The traffic notice

A highway patrol officer has admitted writing "kitchen bitch" as the occupation of a Greymouth teenager on an infringement ticket he issued her.

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Thoughtful guy
A man and a friend are playing golf one day at their local golf course. One of the guys is about to chip onto the green when he sees a long funeral procession on the road next to the course.
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Salesman
A little old lady answered a knock on the door one day, only to be confronted by a well-dressed young ...
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Polish space venture
A family of four Polish people and a few of their Polish friends decided to move to America. They settled into a middle class neighborhood in the heart of the country. Every night since they moved in,the neighbors of the Polish havent gotten any slee
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Safety Lecture
All too rarely, airline attendants make an effort to make the in-flight "safety lecture", and their other announcements a bit ...
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Canadian blonde
An elderly blonde lived on a small farm in Canada, just yards away from the North Dakota border. Their land had been the subject of a minor dispute between the United States and Canada for years. The now widowed blonde, lived on the farm with her son
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Elderly Couple
While on a road trip, an elderly couple stopped at a roadside restaurant for lunch. After finishing their meal, they left the restaurant and resumed their trip.
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Hungry cock
A guy approaches the window of the movie theater with a chicken under his arm, and asks for 2 tickets. The girl at the counter wants to know who is going in with him...
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My word

BEAUTY PARLOR: A place where women curl up and dye. CANNIBAL: Someone who is fed up with people.

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Horse and chicken
A horse and a chicken are playing in a meadow. The horse falls into a mud hole and is sinking. He calls to the chicken to go and get the farmer to help pull him out to safety...
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A young couple
A young couple was in their honeymoon suite on their wedding night. As they undressed for bed, the husband, who ...
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See and Believe
One day a 6 year old girl was sitting in a classroom. The teacher was going to explain evolution to the children. The teacher asked a little boy:
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Alibi

A guy was sitting quietly reading his paper when his wife walked up behind him and whacked him on the head with a magazine. "What was that for?" he asked. "That was for the piece of paper in your pants pocket with the name

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displaying 271-300 from a total of 482