land chut joke

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Safety Lecture
All too rarely, airline attendants make an effort to make the in-flight "safety lecture", and their other announcements a bit ...
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Ground crew
After every flight, Quantas pilots fill out a form, called a "gripe sheet," which tells mechanics about problems with the aircraft. The mechanics correct the problems, document their repairs on the form, then the pilots review the gripe she
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The traffic notice

A highway patrol officer has admitted writing "kitchen bitch" as the occupation of a Greymouth teenager on an infringement ticket he issued her.

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Canadian blonde
An elderly blonde lived on a small farm in Canada, just yards away from the North Dakota border. Their land had been the subject of a minor dispute between the United States and Canada for years. The now widowed blonde, lived on the farm with her son
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Military quotes

"If the enemy is in range, so are you." -Infantry Journal, "It is generally inadvisable to eject directly over the area you just bombed.." -U.S. Air Force Manual

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Heaven and Hell
One day while walking down the street a highly successful Human Resource Director was tragically hit by a bus and ...
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Moses and Jesus
Moses and Jesus were in a threesome playing golf one day. Moses pulled up to the tee and drove a long one. The ball landed in the fairway, but rolled directly toward a water hazard. Quickly Moses raised his club, the water parted and it rolled to the
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Radio conversation

The following is the transcript of an ACTUAL radio conversation in October 1995, between a US Navy ship off the coast of England, and some British authority.

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Airplane Ride
A farmer and his wife went to a fair. The farmer was fascinated by the airplanes and asked a pilot how much a ride would cost.
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Golfing Preacher
There was this preacher who was an avid golfer. Every chance he could get, he could be found on the golf course swinging away.
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Fish and cat story
One spring day, a fish was swimming about a foot below the surface of a lake and saw a fly hovering just out of striking distance. The fish said to itself, "If that fly comes six inches closer...
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Irish bank robbery
Excerpted from an article about a bank robbery which appeared in the Dublin Times (metropolitan edition, page 2A) on 2 March 1999:...
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