Moses, Jesus, and an old man are golfing.
Yes, these are (apparently) all true.
An elderly Italian lived alone in New Jersey. He wanted to plant his annual tomato garden, but it was very difficult work, as the ground was hard.
Any time you feel dumb, don't worry. Check out the following excerpts from a "Wall Street Journal" article by Jim Carlton. Lots of people are dumber than you.
A very elderly couple is having an elegant dinner to celebrate their 75th wedding anniversary.
One day there were four nuns in line for confessional. The first nun said, "Forgive me, father, for I have sinned."
I'm writing you this letter to tell you that I'm leaving you forever. I've been a good man to you for 7 years & I have nothing to show for it. These last 2 weeks have been hell.
To bathe a cat takes brute force, perseverance, courage of conviction, and a cat. The last ingredient is usually the hardest to come by....
On reaching his plane seat a man is surprised to see a parrot strapped in next to him.
While proudly showing off his new apartment to friends late one night, the drunk led the way to his bedroom where there was a big brass gong.