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mother jokes

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Big Confusion
A psychiatrist visited a California mental institution and asked a patient, "How did you get here? What was the nature of your illness?
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The Three Sons

Three sons left home, went out on their own and prospered. Getting back together, they discussed the gifts they were able to give their elderly Mother.

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The 4-letter words
A young couple got married and went on a cruise for their honeymoon. When they got back from the honeymoon, the bride immediately called her mother, who lived a couple of hours away.
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Newlyweds
A young couple got married & went on a cruise for their honeymoon. When they got back from the honeymoon, ...
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Confessions of a kid

Little Bobby came into the kitchen where his mother was making dinner. His birthday was coming up and he thought this was a good time to tell his mother what he wanted.

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Don' t lie to Mom
John invited his mother over for dinner. During the meal, his mother couldn't help noticing how beautiful John's roommate was. She had long been suspicious of a relationship between John and his roommate...
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Love Dress

A mother-in-law stopped unexpectedly by her son's house after he was recently married. She rang the doorbell and stepped into the house to see her daughter-in-law standing naked by the door.

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Cake
One day this little girl and her mother went for a walk. the little girl saw 2 dogs humping. The little girl asked her mother "mommy what are those dogs doing. Her mother said " honey there making cakes...
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Math homework

A little boy was doing his math homework. He said to himself, "Two plus five, that son of a bitch is seven. Three plus six, that son of a bitch is nine."

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Glasgow Girl
An eighteen year-old girl in Glasgow goes home to see her mum and tells her that she has missed her period for two months. Very worried, the mother goes to the chemist and buys a pregnancy kit. The test result shows that the girl is pregnant. Shoutin
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Kiss And Slap

A young technician and his general manager board a train headed through the mountains on its way to Wichita. They can find no place to sit except for two seats right across the aisle from a young woman and her grandmother.

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Brother and sister
Hearing a scream from the playroom, the mother rushed in and found her infant daughter pulling the hair of her four-year-old brother. After separating them, the mother said to her son,Do not be upset with your sister, honey. She didn' t know...
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Genie Wishes
One day a man found an odd-looking lamp and rubbed it. From inside came a genie that told him he ...
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Mafia Christmas
A Mafioso’s son sits at his desk writing a Christmas list to Jesus. He first writes, "Dear baby Jesus, I ...
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Generous lawyer

A local United Way office realized that the organization had never received a donation from the town's most successful lawyer. The person in charge of contributions called him to persuade him to contribute.

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Deer Hunter
A sportsman, and father of 3 sons, was anxious to share his latest kill with his family for Sunday dinner. ...
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Broken Seal
When the mother returned from the grocery store, her small son pulled out the box of animal crackers he had ...
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