neked funy a jokes

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Healthy level of insanity

How To Maintain A Healthy Level Of Insanity: 1. At lunch time, sit in your parked car with sunglasses on and point a hair dryer at passing cars. See if they slow down.

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The Angel Atop The Tree Tradition
One Christmas, Santa was having a really bad day. The ...
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Bullfight Buffet
A man goes to Spain and attends a bullfight. Afterwards he goes to a nearby restaurant and orders the specialty of the day.
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Einstein's chauffeur
When Albert Einstein was making the rounds of the speaker’s circuit, he usually found himself eagerly longing to get back to his laboratory work.
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Forgive Me Father
This man goes to confession and says, "Forgive me father for I have sinned." The priest asks if he ...
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That's Once
A couple was celebrating their golden wedding anniversary. Their domestic tranquility had long been the talk of the town.
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Revenge
After 17 years of marriage, a man dumped his wife for a younger woman. The downtown luxury apartment was in ...
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You know it's 2004 when...
You know it's 2004 when... 1. You accidentally enter your ...
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The mugger
Late one night a mugger wearing a ski mask jumped into a path of a well-dressed man and stuck a ...
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The nonconformist bird
There once was a nonconformist bird that decided not to fly south for the winter. He said "I've had enough of this flying south every winter, I'll just stay right here on this farm, what's the big deal, anyway?"...
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Only one wish

A woman was walking along the beach when she stumbled upon a Genie's lamp. She picked it up and rubbed it, and lo-and-behold a Genie appeared.

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Steven Wright 1
If you're not familiar with the work of Steven Wright, he's the guy who once said: "I woke up one ...
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God is watching

The children were lined up in the cafeteria of a Catholic elementary school for lunch.

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Birthday Treat
Dave works hard at the plant and spends most evenings bowling or playing basketball at the gym. His wife thinks ...
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Driving Styles
Depending on where someone is from and where they are driving you can make some assumptions about their driving styles and etiquette...
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Weaving driver
A police officer pulls over this guy who's been weaving in and out of the lanes. He goes up to the guy's window and says, "Sir, I need you to blow into this breathalyzer tube." The man says, "Sorry, officer, I can't do t
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The camel joke
There's this guy walking along a road to town with his camel. Along the way, a guy stops and ask's if he needs a ride to town. The guy say's, yeah. He hop's in, the driver say's, what about your camel...
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Rules for men
FIVE RULES FOR MEN TO FOLLOW TO A HAPPY LIFE:1. It's important to have a woman, who helps at ...
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The traffic notice

A highway patrol officer has admitted writing "kitchen bitch" as the occupation of a Greymouth teenager on an infringement ticket he issued her.

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Arthritis
A drunk that smelled like a brewery got on a bus one day. He sat down next to a priest.
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Embarrassing Situations
A very shy guy goes into a bar and sees a beautiful woman sitting at the other end. After an ...
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College graduate
A young man hired by a supermarket reported for his first day of work.
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Stupid Brother
A pregnant woman is in a car accident and falls into a deep coma. Asleep for nearly six months, she ...
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Twenty bucks
A well-known speaker started off his seminar by holding up a $20.00 bill. In the room of 200 he asked, "Who would like this $20 bill?" Hands started going up. He said, "I am going to give this $20 to one of you but first, let me do thi
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USA Senior Health Care Solution
USA Senior Health Care Solution So you're a senior ...
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25 phrases you wish you could say at work more often
1. Ahhh...I see the fuck-up fairy has visited us ...
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The Truest Definition of Globalization
Question: What is the truest definition of Globalization? Answer: ...
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My word

BEAUTY PARLOR: A place where women curl up and dye. CANNIBAL: Someone who is fed up with people.

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Beethoven Symphonies
A tourist in Vienna is going through a graveyard and all ofa sudden he hears some music. No one ...
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Blondevision
A blonde went to an appliance store sale and found a bargain. "I would like to buy this TV," she told the salesman.
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displaying 241-270 from a total of 586