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Michael Jackson picks his nose...
Q. How does Michael Jackson pick his nose? A. From ...
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Thats it!
A general noticed one of his soldiers behaving oddly. The soldier would pick up any piece of paper he found, ...
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Rats
A tourist wanders into a back-alley antique shop in San Francisco's Chinatown. Picking through the objects on display he discovers a detailed bronze sculpture of a rat...
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The blonde and the walkman
A blonde went to a hair dresser's one day, listening ...
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Driving Styles
Depending on where someone is from and where they are driving you can make some assumptions about their driving styles and etiquette...
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Top 10 signs you're addicted to the net
1. You wake up at 3 a.m. to go ...
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Embarrassing moments

A radio station in Australia recently ran a phone-in competition to find the most embarrassing moments in the lives of their listeners.

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Deep hole

Two guys are walking through the woods and come across this big deep hole. "Wow...that looks deep." "Sure does... toss a few pebbles in there and see how deep it is."

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Great Sayings!
If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried...
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Things Not To Say In Bed

1. But everybody looks funny naked! 2. You woke me up for that? 3. Did I mention the video camera?

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Healthy level of insanity

How To Maintain A Healthy Level Of Insanity: 1. At lunch time, sit in your parked car with sunglasses on and point a hair dryer at passing cars. See if they slow down.

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Twenty bucks
A well-known speaker started off his seminar by holding up a $20.00 bill. In the room of 200 he asked, "Who would like this $20 bill?" Hands started going up. He said, "I am going to give this $20 to one of you but first, let me do thi
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Bored dealers
Two bored casino dealers were waiting at a craps table when a very attractive blonde woman arrived and bet $20,000 ...
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Confessions of a kid

Little Bobby came into the kitchen where his mother was making dinner. His birthday was coming up and he thought this was a good time to tell his mother what he wanted.

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Christmas in West Virginia
  Twas the Night before Christmas, and all through the ...
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To the zoo
A police officer sees a man driving around with a pickup truck full of penguins. He pulls the guy over ...
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The Swimming Head
Three guys enter a disabled swimming contest. The first has no arms.
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Mother for a While
A young man was walking through a supermarket to pick up a few things when he noticed an old lady ...
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Help to the stranger
A man is in bed with his wife when there is a rat-a-tat-tat on the door. He rolls over and looks at his clock, and it's half past three in the morning. "I'm not getting out of bed at this time," he thinks, and rolls over. Then, a
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The Greatest
A little boy was overheard talking to himself as he strutted through the backyard, wearing his baseball cap and toting ...
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Foreign Signs
1. Cocktail lounge, Norway: LADIES ARE REQUESTED NOT TO HAVE CHILDREN IN THE BAR.
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Yo mamma so short...
Yo mamma so short she poses for trophies! Yo mamma so short you can see her feet on her drivers lisence!
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Top ten reasons not to join the empire
10. Stormtroopers are the Empire's first line of defense.9. ...
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Job application
This is an actual job application a 17 year old boy submitted at a McDonald's fast-food establishment in Florida...and ...
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Penguins
A police officer sees a man driving around with a pickup truck full of penguins. He pulls the guy over and says, "You can't drive around with penguins in this town! Take them to the zoo immediately."
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Heaven and Hell
One day while walking down the street a highly successful Human Resource Director was tragically hit by a bus and ...
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Things you would never know without the movies
* During all police investigations, it will be necessary to ...
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Understanding Marketing
You see a fabulous girl/guy at a party. You approach them and say, "I'm fantastic in bed."That's Direct Marketing.
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Little Johnny
Little Johnny was sitting in class doing math problems when his teacher picked him to answer a question, "Johnny, if there were five birds sitting on a fence and you shot one with your gun...
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Glasgow Girl
An eighteen year-old girl in Glasgow goes home to see her mum and tells her that she has missed her period for two months. Very worried, the mother goes to the chemist and buys a pregnancy kit. The test result shows that the girl is pregnant. Shoutin
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