A man went to the doctor complaining of insomnia.
When you occasionally have a really bad day, and you just need to take it out on someone, don't take it out on someone you know -- take it out on someone you don't know.
A man and his wife were having an argument about who should brew the coffee each morning.
To bathe a cat takes brute force, perseverance, courage of conviction, and a cat. The last ingredient is usually the hardest to come by....
While proudly showing off his new apartment to friends late one night, the drunk led the way to his bedroom where there was a big brass gong.
I was a very happy man. My wonderful girlfriend and I had been dating for over a year, and so we decided to get married. There was only one little thing bothering me - it was her beautiful younger sister.
One day there were four nuns in line for confessional. The first nun said, "Forgive me, father, for I have sinned."
On reaching his plane seat a man is surprised to see a parrot strapped in next to him.