Yes, these are (apparently) all true.
A young man moved into a new apartment on his own, and went to the lobby to put his name on his mailbox.
An elderly lady did her shopping and, upon returning to her car, found four males in the act of leaving with her car. She dropped her shopping bags and drew her handgun, proceeding to scream at them at the top of her voice, "I have
A girl asks her boyfriend to come over Friday night and have dinner with her parents. Since this is such a big event, the girl tells him that after dinner, she would like to have sex with him for the first time.
Some people have the misconception that cats never have to be bathed.