Yes, these are (apparently) all true.
Tough Being A Guy
If you work too hard, there is never any time for her.
If you don't work enough, you're a good-for-nothing bum.
I'm writing you this letter to tell you that I'm leaving you forever. I've been a good man to you for 7 years & I have nothing to show for it. These last 2 weeks have been hell.
"If the enemy is in range, so are you." -Infantry Journal, "It is generally inadvisable to eject directly over the area you just bombed.." -U.S. Air Force Manual
When you have an ‘I Hate My Job’ day, try this: On your way home from work, stop at your pharmacy...
Any time you feel dumb, don't worry. Check out the following excerpts from a "Wall Street Journal" article by Jim Carlton. Lots of people are dumber than you.